Kids change everything...

It’s true. They do. They change everything.

I was reminded of this recently when I attempted to re-visit the beautiful Outer Banks with Ava and Lincoln. Here’s a little background: during my high school and early college years my parents owned and rented an awesome house in Corolla. We spent many weekends there and stocked up on countless memories. It’s my happy place. Seriously, I have so many wonderful and random memories from Tuna Gorda - most notably, though, was New Year’s 2000. There will never be another party like that anywhere ever.

See?

After my recent trip to the OBX with Ava & Lincoln I like to think that those pre-offspring years at Tuna Gorda were a gift to me from my parents. Thanks, Mom and Dad. I appreciate those years now more than ever before!

Sigh...

Now, about my recent trip to Corolla with kids… Turns out, my friend’s family owns and rents a house two streets away from Tuna Gorda. What are the chances?! Somehow, their house wasn’t rented last week so it was available for their family/friends. My friend’s husband was out of town so she decided to toss her two kids in the car and head to their beach house for a few days. The house sleeps 18 so she invited a couple other mom friends and their kids (me included). Sounds fun, right? I was looking forward to this trip like you wouldn’t believe. Chris was staying home to go to work and probably just relish in a quiet house for a few days. I couldn’t wait to walk to the lighthouse with the kids and shop around Duck and play on the beach. I guess, somehow, in all my fantasizing about the beach I forgot that I have two young children and I’m only one parent. Really, it didn’t matter because I was determined to make it work. I was determined to make memories.

Well, Ava did great but Lincoln didn’t sleep…at all. Actually, that’s not true, he slept from 5 a.m. to 7 a.m. Two hours of sleep doesn’t work for me anymore. It was so stressful. I couldn’t keep him happy and I couldn’t convince him to sleep. I tried everything. Because we were in a house full of other sleeping children (and adults) I couldn’t let him cry. Because I had Ava sleeping at the house I couldn’t just put Lincoln and the car and drive him around until he fell asleep. I was trapped. I didn’t have the luxuries of home (toys, food, movies). Also, I didn’t have the luxury of another parent to rely on. I was exhausted from the day and I just wanted to sleep. Lincoln and I came up with a lot of innovative ways to pass the time. We paced, mostly. We paced around the pool table and we paced up and down the driveway at 2 a.m. and again at 4 a.m. By “paced” I mean that I carried him. He’s a big boy. He’s too big to be carried through the night. My arms and back were sore for days afterward. We sang countless songs. We made up songs – mostly about sleep. I wanted to cry but I was afraid that my sniffling would prevent him from falling asleep.

This is Lincoln not sleeping at the beach...

As we were passing time, ever so slowly, through the wee hours of the morning my mind was flooded with memories of the good ol’ days at the beach, the days when I didn’t have a care in the world. I couldn’t help but feel sorry for myself.

Behold the good ol' days...

I was so tired at 7 a.m. when Lincoln was done sleeping and I decided that we should drive home that day rather than risk another all-nighter. Chances are that he would have slept the next night out of pure exhaustion and adjustment…but it wasn’t a risk that I thought was worth taking. I’d reached my limit and I was getting a little too close for comfort to my breaking point. I felt bad for Ava. She was so looking forward to our little excursion. Thankfully, she understood and she was happy to get a little beach time that day. I also felt like the whiney loser who left early but I got over that pretty quickly. Less than 24 hours after our arrival at the beach I was packing up the car to head home and that never felt so good. Obviously, it was a big disappointment but it was also a big relief.

A few minutes of fun on the beach before heading home...

As if the beach experience wasn’t enough I ran into all sorts of obstacles on the drive home. I was anxious to get on the road around Linc’s naptime so I rushed lunch and therefore neglected to eat any food myself. I figured I’d just grab something once we were on the road. Ha! Twenty minutes into the drive both kids fell fast asleep. There weren’t any drive thru joints. Again, I was trapped. I told myself that it’s a short enough drive and I can make it. I was following navigation and it led me into downtown Norfolk. This added 45 minutes to our drive. It also sent us through the Hampton Roads Bridge Tunnel, which is notorious for always being backed up. Sure enough, there was a 7-mile backup. The kids woke up and they woke up hungry. My head was pounding. We were trapped in tunnel traffic. We sang songs and we danced and we tried to make the best of it. Somewhere in all of this madness I remembered that our water heater at home was broken. I didn’t want to go home to a cold shower so I re-routed to Honey and Papa’s house. I ate a lot, I drank a glass or two of wine and I took a warm shower. Things were looking better already.

That night Lincoln slept well, as did I. I took a two-hour nap the following day, too. We’re all OK. We survived. I understand that it could have been much worse. As stressful as it was, it’s one of those teaching experiences and I don’t want to forget it so it's logged here now as "Adventures of Motherhood." I think the experience earned that tag.

Our 24-hour beach trip was also a good reminder that kids change everything. There are days when I miss the tranquility that was my life before having children but there are more days when I relish in my love and admiration for them. Sure I miss the good ol’ days at the beach but more than that I look forward to making new memories at the beach with my family and giving them the gift that my parents gave me...memories.

RIP Tuna Gorda.