10 Years

That’s how many years of my life I think I lost today. Linc took a spill this morning. A bad spill. In the garden. Down the cement steps. Head first. Ugh, my heart starts beating quickly just typing that. It was horrible. This was his first really bad spill and I know it’s OK and it’s part of growing up and learning but none of that makes it any easier for me to handle. I hate that I didn’t get there fast enough to break the fall and I hate that I couldn’t instantly take the pain and fear away for him. I instantly wanted to cry and I probably would have if I didn’t have the company of another Mom there. And I’m so thankful to have had her company. I’m so thankful someone else was there to witness it and help me determine the severity of the accident. He calmed down rather quickly; I gave him a bath in an effort to examine the rest of his precious body and to help calm him. He has a bump on his head, his nose is beat up and his leg is scratched. I kept him awake for an hour and a half and I fed him lunch and I watched him like a hawk. He’s fine. He was happy and he played and he was fine. So then why do I still feel sick to my stomach? I couldn’t stop shaking for an hour. My nerves are shot. It’s really not that bad. It just scared me. The sound when he fell was awful. I truly thought he split his head open. I know I’m overreacting, but I’m responsible for that little person and I don’t like it when he’s scared and hurt.

What was I just saying about how boys are different than girls? Ava is much too cautious to risk a fall like that and that’s how she has always been. Linc likes to sit on the couch like his sister when they watch TV together. I have to sit on the floor below him because when he’s done and he wants to get off the couch he just stands up and tries to walk off the couch. No matter how many times I try to show him how to safely dismount, he still just walks off the edge of the couch and into thin air…

Honestly, how do people have more than two children? This is more than my heart can handle and my kids have many more years, boo boos and obstacles ahead of them…

Lincoln Otto, I’m going to share this story with you when you’re behaving like an ornery teenager and don’t you dare roll your eyes at me! I’m your mother and I love you and I will keep you safe and that’s all there is to that.

The evil stairs...

The result...

I know, it looks like nothing. Mind you, this is after his bath and a snack and I had to use the flash on the camera which washes everything out anyway. Trust me, it was a bad fall! Isn't he just the sweetest...?

This is Ava reenacting the fall for Chris tonight...

Needless to say, I'm glad he's snug as a bug in a rug in his bed right now. Tomorrow is another day...